So… I’m all knocked up and stuff…
One whole post since starting this blog… I suck, you must be thinking.
Well… no. I can honestly say that if I sucked, I wouldn’t be in this situation to start off with.
Shortly after beginning this blog, my beau and I found out we were expecting. Expecting trouble by the looks of things.
So this blog is changing…
And no, don’t run in horror. It’s not going to become a mommy blogger. I’m not that daft, or that boring (no offence) and the price of washing powder really is of no current interest to me.
It’s going to be a bad mother’s club of sorts.
This is cos all those airy fairy, maternal shnartzy fartzy feelings that tend to ooze from expectant or wannabe mums has not so much as bounced off me as yet and I feel I cannot be the only mother to be slash mother who feels that this all is not actually heaps of fun.
So far, I’ve had to accommodate bloat, gas, fibre, painful tendon growth, the inability to see your vadge over the ever expanding tum, skin stretch, farting, burping, losing your mind, gaining a sense of smell (oh my word, I can smell when our neighbour two blocks down has had onions for dinner – in more ways than one), bleeding gums, a sore head, exhaustion, hormones, tears and a weird thing is happening to one of my eyelids!
Oh, and let me not forget boobs so sore you can barely get a bra wrapped around them without eyeing out nearby sharp objects with an aim to slicing the buggers off. But do not even think about going bra-less because it becomes fairly obvious fairly soon that your boobs are NEVER going to sit pretty again and you are ALWAYS going to need a bra from now until forever. Man, I have some level of gazoomba floating around on my chest today…this child better latch, that’s all I’m saying.
Yes, there are good sides. The kid, as you can see from the picture, has an awesome sense of humour and I can’t wait for him to get here.
But I’m not pretending this is fairytale land unless and until it suddenly becomes okay to take schedule five drugs whilst carrying :-).
Chat soon! Leave comments! No judgement here. 🙂